October 23, 2017

Geeks and Jocks Fight Over Control of the TV in a Sports Bar

So you are sitting in a bar watching a football game(in this case a soccer game) and then some other guys come in and want you to turn the television off the game (in a sports bar) and turn it to something called “Starcraft.”

What is Starcraft? Well apparently it is something important enough to get a bunch of geeks so works up that a physical altercation broke out in the bar between two sets of people, the jocks and the geeks.

Yes, I know using these words is a bit rough, but the story is so humorous that it needed to be spoken about.

What is the best part of this story? Looks like the jocks got put in their place by the geeks. Note to self, don’t stand in the way of someone who wants to watch Starcraft.

Full Story Here

Fed Up with Son’s Video Game Addiction, Ma Calls the Police

Police responded to a 911 call after a MA mother could not get her son to stop playing Grand Theft Auto.

Apparently the frustrated mother had attempted several times to put an end to her sons late night gaming habits before calling 911 to report his misbehavin’.

Angela Mejia finally snapped when she woke 2.30am to find her 14-year-old son’s light still on, reports the Boston Herald.

Luckily it sounds like police were able to talk him into giving up the game for the night.


Saudi Man Attacked Over Threat to Wed Third Wife

A Saudi man lost a bit of his nose in a joint assault by his two wives after he jokingly threatened to marry a third woman.

Judaie Ibn Salem had thought his threat would help resolve an argument over dividing up his house.

“I swore that I would do it because … they were impolite and that’s when I came under an even bigger attack,” Ibn Salem told Shams newspaper after having seven stitches inserted.

“I never realised they would get so worked up. But the only way to restore my dignity is really to take a third wife.

“I don’t know what I’m going to lose next if I do that.”

Islamic law allows men to take up to four wives and polygamy is not unusual in the conservative kingdom of Saudi Arabia, the birthplace of Islam.

It’s pretty messed up that Islamic men can have many wifes and the women can only have one husband. I’m glad the women fought against the idea.

If he knows what’s good for him, he won’t go through with another marriage otherwise he could lose more than his dignity. There have been many incidents recently of women cutting or biting off a man’s member out of jealousy. He could be next.


Washington Home Emptied After Craigslist Ad Gave the OK

A fake ad posted last weekend on Craigslist led to property being stripped off of a rental home in Tacoma, Washington.

“In the ad, it said come and take what you want. Everything is free,” Landlord Laurie Raye said.

She had cleaned out the house after evicting a tenant.

Not long after the ad appeared, neighbors saw strangers taking items away. They made off with a sink, light fixtures, the hot water heater, a vinyl window and the front door.

Raye said Craigslist told her they would need a subpoena or search warrant before they could release information about who posted the ad.

Police Detective Gretchen Ellis said: “We’ve had prostitution things happen, rental scams, fraudulent activity. In this case, it appeared the items were going to be given away, but they were not.”

I have a feeling the evicted tenant did it for revenge.


Swaying Hips is Misbehavior?

Gay police officers in the Philippines have been told not to sway their hips while on duty, otherwise they would get fired.

“If they sway their hips while marching, or if they engage in lustful conduct, I think that will be a ground for separation. If they behave within the norm, I don’t think we’ll have a problem,” said Chief Supt Samuel Pagdilao, who claimed the force did not discriminate.

This sounds like a bad case of homophobia. As long as it’s not affecting their job performance, gay officers should be allowed to sway all they want.


Man Gets Pizza Tattoo on Head

Colin Helsby, of north Wales, has had a slice of ham and pineapple pizza tattooed on the back of his head in order to raise money for a cystic fibrosis charity and to celebrate the opening of his new pizza shop.

The tattoo shows three types of ham, chunks of pizza, and strands of cheese dripping down his neck, and took three hours to complete.

See Photo.

Pizza is probably the worst food to have tattooed on your body. His head looks like a greasy mess.

The 45-year-old told reporters: “I’m really pleased with it, and I’ll keep my head shaved at the back for a few weeks to show it off.”

The tattooist, Blane Dickinson, tattooed a full English breakfast on top of a man’s head last month.


You Can Enjoy Great Sex in the Afterlife?

Chinese cemeteries are selling paper replicas of Viagra pills, images of condoms, and heavily made-up bar girls for people to burn for dead relatives so they can have great sex in the afterlife.

Authorities have attempted to prevent the sales, but have been unsuccessful thanks to high demand due to the upcoming annual Tombsweeping Festival on April 5.

I find this fascinating, but I highly doubt dead people are concerned about getting it up or sexual protection.

Chinese have traditionally burned fake money in honour of dead relatives during the festival, when families clean their ancestors’ tombs and graves.

They believe the wealth will accrue to their ancestors in the afterlife.

But China’s move toward a more consumer-oriented society has seen new offerings including paper televisions, cellphones, cars and other luxury items.

There was no word as to whether paper replicas of sex toys were being sold.


Chinese Man Grows Nails for 15 Years

Li Jianping 43, of Shishi City, Fujian province, has been growing the nails on his left hand for the past 23 years.

“When I was 20, I read a news report saying an Indian man had let the fingernails on his left hand grow to around one meter. Then I made up my mind to surpass him,” he told the Straits City News.

“Before 1992, my nails were broken twice in accidents: once when I was moving things, the second time by a friend. Each time I had to start over.”

Li, a grocery store owner, admitted that the nails were often inconvenient.

“I never go to crowded places. And during sleep, I have to keep my left wrist under my head to prevent the hand from moving.”

His nails are now one meter long in total after 15 years without accidents.

See a photo here.

I think it’s safe to assume he never gets any… Those things look like they could easily take an eye out, slice a neck and destroy vital organs, all at the same time.


Captain America Has Died

Captain America, the main character of the popular Marvel Entertainment comic book, has died in issue 25, which hit stands today.

And all across the world, comic book lovers mourn the loss of a true hero.

He had been leaving a courthouse when a sniper’s bullet struck him in the shoulder, and another in the stomach.

I guess he didn’t have his shield in front of him.

Captain America might still be alive today if he’d had super powers.

It’s surprising that none of his enemies came up with this idea in the 66 years he’s been saving the world..

Series writer Ed Brubaker, 40, told the New York Daily news that he wanted to explore what the hero meant to the country.

“What I found is that all the really hardcore left-wing fans want Cap to be standing out on and giving speeches on the street corner against the Bush administration and all the really right-wing (fans) all want him to be over in the streets of Baghdad, punching out Saddam,” Brubaker said.

Captain America Co-creator, Joe Simon, 93, was disappointed.

“It’s a hell of a time for him to go. We really need him now,” Simon said.


Chinese Sleep-Walker Washes Clothes

Mrs. Xu, 46, of Wuhan city, Hubei province, has regularly washed clothes in the middle of the night while sleep-walking, for the past 10 years.

“She sleep-walks at least ten times a year, and each time does the same thing: wash clothes for the family,” her husband said.

“The next morning when she wakes up, she’ll praise me for doing so much.”

The husband even installed locks on their door to prevent Xu from leaving to wash neighbor’s clothes.

Of all things to do while sleep-walking, chores. At least it’s safe.