July 25, 2017

Flammable Toilets Receive Free Repairs

Japan’s leading toilet manufacturer, Toto, is providing free repairs to 180,000 toilets after three reported incidents of its Z series catching fire.

“Fortunately nobody was using the toilets when the fire broke out and there were no injuries,” a company spokesman said.

“The fire would have been just under your buttocks.”

Toto builds high-tech toilets with built-in electric bidets, which caused the fires.

The versatile Z series also features a power dryer, a ‘tornado wash’ flush, a pulsating massage spray, and an automatic lid.

I don’t care if the repairs are free. If I owned one of these toilets, I would much rather buy a new one that has no electric accessory/chance of flaming my backside.

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China Plans to Produce Paper from Panda Poop

Researchers at China’s Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base in central-western Sichuan province are planning to join forces with area paper mills in an effort to make use of about two tons of fibrous panda poop dropped everyday.

The researchers got the idea from Thailand, where elephant feces are used to create an array of products, including artificial flowers, gift boxes and photo frames.

“We are not interested in doing this for the profits but to recycle the waste,” Researcher Liao Jun told the Associated Press. “It’s environmentally friendly. We can use the paper ourselves and also we can sell whatever is left over.”

I definitely can’t see myself using paper that came out of a panda’s pooper. They better not use it to create paper plates.

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You Can Enjoy Great Sex in the Afterlife?

Chinese cemeteries are selling paper replicas of Viagra pills, images of condoms, and heavily made-up bar girls for people to burn for dead relatives so they can have great sex in the afterlife.

Authorities have attempted to prevent the sales, but have been unsuccessful thanks to high demand due to the upcoming annual Tombsweeping Festival on April 5.

I find this fascinating, but I highly doubt dead people are concerned about getting it up or sexual protection.

Chinese have traditionally burned fake money in honour of dead relatives during the festival, when families clean their ancestors’ tombs and graves.

They believe the wealth will accrue to their ancestors in the afterlife.

But China’s move toward a more consumer-oriented society has seen new offerings including paper televisions, cellphones, cars and other luxury items.

There was no word as to whether paper replicas of sex toys were being sold.

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Wind Breakers

Talk about odd inventions, a US lingerie has created underwear that blocks the smell of farts.

Under-Ease pants have an in-built multi-layered, replaceable filter, made of felt, charcoal and fibreglass wool to absorb odour.

The underpants are made from air-tight fabric and are completely sealed with elastic around the waistband and legs to prevent any gas escaping.

Under-Tec inventor Buck Weimer said: “Under-Ease are underwear for protection against bad human gas.

“We get a lot of jokes – but we don’t doubt that this is a serious product that serves a purpose.”

The pants are machine washable and the filters can last as long as several months, depending on the frequency of use and laundering.

Where were they when this woman needed it.

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Scented Clothes

Vanilla candles, carpet fresheners, air mist sprays and other home fragrance products accounted for $3.4 billion in sales last year. Now researchers are looking at ways to permanently infuse scents into textiles.The scent-infused fabrics could lead to pleasant-smelling blankets and sheets, give holiday linens a festive fragrance and make gym clothes less odoriferous.

“Some of the strongest ideas we have are in athletic clothing…but we’re going to see success in apparel and home textiles, such as towels, too,” said John Pierce, associate professor of psychology at Philadelphia University.

This sounds kinda cool but wouldn’t it be weird if your shirt smelled like vanilla, your pants smelled like cocoa butter and your socks smelled like lavender?

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Music and Condoms

Hong Kong designer condom maker, Ondo Creation recently unleashed the Idom, a range of mint, strawberry, chocolate and banana-flavored condoms that come with a music CD to get lovers in the mood.

The Exotica, Chocotasy and Loveberry brands contain compilations of chillout, acid jazz and dance music.

“The music starts slow, then medium, then becomes fast before getting slow again,” Jack Wong, the man behind the music said. “It lasts 18 minutes. Whether this is long enough or not really depends on the individual.”

Next thing you know they’ll invent musical condoms…

Out of curiosity, I just Googled musical condoms and as it turns out, it’s already been done!

A Ukraine scientist invented musical condoms months ago that gets louder and faster as lovers reach a climax. Read More>>

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